I'm in Nc right now visiting my mom. I got here yesterday morning at 3am. I leave tomorrow. Then reality will set in. The house I am living in was sold in a quick sale. Everyone is leaving. My dad hasn't talked to me in over a week. I have no where to go. But I guess I'm jumping ahead of myself I mean I haven't been on in awhile and things have changed.....

Once we knew for sure that Maria was losing her house we( my dad, gma, and marie) started looking for a house. My dad would find one and then have Marie or me call. Things weren't looking to good. Rent was too high, no garage, no fence, no pets. It was dissapointment after dissapointment. Until we got a realator. After that things seemed to look up. Marie and I were still doing the work but we had an adult to help us. We found a house. This was in November. My dad even went and looked inside. Then I arranged a meeting with the realator and agent. My dad decided the day before that he didn't want the house, but Marie and I went anyway.  After we got home he was still set on no house and I had had enough. I couldn't take the stress anymore and I broke down. I thought I guess I'll have to move to NC with my mom. I worried about my bills (ortho. and doctors) I don't make much as a cashier. It's $150 for my braces a month and $100 for my doctors a month. I didn't know how I was going to do it since it might take me awhile to find a job here. I worried about my gma. She is on oxygen and so she HAS to have electricity wherever she goes. Where is she going? I worried about Marie. My other half. Where would she go? Last night while her and I were talking to my mom, my mom told me that their was no way I could bring Charlie(my dog). So that means no me. I could never turn my back on my dog. He isn't a family dog, he is mine. My responsibility. He looks to me to take care of him. I'm his mom. How could anyone expect me to leave him or give him away as if he's just a piece of clothing or an old toy. I wish my parents would care for me as much as I care for him.

Tomorrow I will be back in VA. After that I don't know. Where do you sleep when you're homeless? It's a scary feeling. I wonder often..too often if life is even worth living anymore. But again I couldn't abandon Charlie. I'm tired of breaking down, I'm tired of holding back tears. I'm tired of my dad saying hurtful things to me. I don't sleep so I'm tired from lack of rest. There is no tree. Their are no lights. No presants. All I want for Christmas is a roof over my head.

Renee.

                                                   "Can I stay with you?...Can I stay with you please?"

                                                                                 "Of course!"

                                                                                   "Really?"

                                                                                    "No."

For those of you that read this: Sorry I don't get on here much anymore. I do have a tumblr and twitter which are updated more often than this.
Oh where to start?
I'm mad at my "friends." For different reasons. The only ones I'm not mad at are Jayme, Chris, and Jamie.
I don't know if the others know that I am mad at them. I don't care either way.
The amphitheater is gonna be over soon. We only have 3 more shows left. Seems like it just started. I'm going to miss it.
Hunt Club is starting up soon. I'm really excited. Things are going to be different. I don't know if that's a good thing or bad thing.
Still no house.
The TV is broken so I mostly stay in my room and read. I rearranged my room recently. People ask me why and I don't really have a good reason. I just wanted more room to dance. I succeeded.
I made a couple videos, since I've learned how to.
I'm looking forward to something but I don't know what it is.
Does that make sense?
Doesn't matter.
Peace,
Renee.

I am depriving myself of sleep once again. It's weird because I love sleeping, it is one of my favorite things to do. But I get a feeling of accomplishment when I decide not to sleep and I go thru with it. Also when I finally do sleep, I appreciate it much more. So with music playing and coffee in hand I'm going to update.

We have to move by the end of August. I'm very excited. Which is a good feeling. I wish we had a house but I'm not worried. I was given a record player and a pretty wicked system to go with it. I can't wait to put it in my new room. Not much going on. I was very stressed for a few days. I may be getting a second job. I'll find out tomorrow.

Friday- Hanging out with Amanda.

Saturday-Hanging out with Alex.

Sunday- Working lil' wayne concert.

My most recent adventure was Warped Tour. As some of you know I was working for the band InnerPartySystem. It was an amazing day. And they are really cool guys. Pictures? Of course.

Enjoy!

Renee.

Sean from 3OH!3

InnerPartySystem! Above and Below.

John from The Maine. above and below.

Kennedy from The Maine.

Garrett from The Maine.

John and Garrett in the back.

Jared from The Maine. I didn't know I got of picture of him.

After The Maine had played I wanted to get a shot of the drums but the crew were quick on their feet. So I didn't get a pic of Pat. But I went to their signing and got my paper signed.

Marie after 12 hours. Leaving the venue.

Me looking like a hot mess. And no we are not twins although I realize these to pics look very simmilar.

Marie took a surprise pic of me. At warped.

These pics are with Kelsey and the Chaos. BTW that is the sign I had to carry around. They seemed to enjoy posing with it.

MORE INNERPARTYSYSTEM!